Di: I will let you in and I will have my memorial plaque. And my currency revaluation.

Xander: Look , I may have a reputation for being a manipulative bastard, but I have standards!

Xander: A moral code! I’ve never been anything but forthright in the economic system of Eynhallow and I don’t intend to start lying to people and ripping off their labor now!

Di: But it’s for their own good! Everyone is miserable with the system as it is! You’d e absolutely amazed at the vibrancy of the black market.

Xander: I’m not amazed. I’m horrified.

Xander: It’s almost like people are trying to pretend something is illegal in order to feel guilty about committing their made-up sin!

Xander: I have never condemned the use of barter or trade! It gives people the innate understanding that money is simply a convenient symbolic representation of their labor.

Di: Can you believe him, Kore? He thinks everyone on the island is an economic genius.

Di: I want an economy that’s user-friendly! Something people want to participate in. Easy to understand!

Di: The work groups for instance…everyone is constantly angling for special jobs so they can fulfill the work requirement without getting hauled off every day in your chain gangs.

Xander: That was…the whole point.

Xander: No one is required to work. You’re perfectly free to starve to death.

Xander: Far be it from me to interfere with the laws of nature.

Di: But you can’t just require people to work, that’s slavery!

Di: They don’t understand economics your majesty, and they never will.

Xander: Well, educate them!

Di: And it will go straight through their Swiss-cheese brains.

Di: Read last night’s parliamentary minutes, Kore! Oh most dredd evil overlord…may lice riddle your…

Di: …your socks…

Di: … there was a sighting yesterday! A UFO sighting. An oblong shaped craft glided over in the middle of the day right as the riot was ramping up.

Xander: What are the odds?

Di: It landed in a shower flight in the forest outside town and dropped off a sinister giant dressed all in black…whose dark forces incited the people to madness…the first wave of an alien invasion!

Di: Now people are polling 60-40 that the Evil Overlord is the only one powerful enough to repulse the aliens and save the island. Kore’s campaign is practically over.

Kore: Mike Barazza is efficient an da bit tracer-happy. What can I say?